Big Ginormous Present, waiting to be unwrapped . . .

The December wind woke me up. Or, maybe, my brain was not really buying into sleep to begin with. In either case, here I am writing away. Sometimes writing can be a form of meditation for me — getting anything swirling around up there out and into black and white is an act which, sometimes, brings me some breathing room.

Sometimes I experience myself in the act of discovering, or rediscovering, something in a way that resonates with me at just the right moment. While beginning to worrywart over job applications, career aspirations, Christmas countdowns and similar, I came across something written this week which has given me a good poke:

A lot of my work these days has really been about unwrapping myself. The idea of “unwrapping” is found on a post I happened upon this evening at Cheerio Road (a blog I visit off and on). I am so glad that I found this writing tonight, just when I really needed to see this all in a different way. I’ll cut-and-paste a selection of it so that you may follow:

We dare not yet pick up our own instrument for fear of, well, everything. We are cautious, guarded, unprepared. Getting closer, we tell ourselves. Getting ready. Awaiting the moment of fulfillment, when our mastery will be revealed. In the meantime, our virtuosity is unchallenged, shielded beneath layers of tissue, inert, immobile, a precious empty ideal. Held in reserve for one day.

Sometimes, when I am afraid of acting, I will feel my whole self holding in the breath, waiting. And waiting. But there are no perfect moments for anything. There is only taking the step, or the leap, or whatever the action is. Life is not waiting for anyone to be “ready” — it has always been “ready or not, here it comes”! So no more holding in, and no more hiding beneath lots of layers of “shoulds” and “could haves” and many, many “buts”. Not far beneath all that is my spirit, beyond ready to bust out.

I will redirect you to the full post, which contains intuitive thoughts to propel the act of unwrapping: “How To Unwrap Your Life”.

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